| Not Amused ( @ 2003-06-15 00:00:00 |
A call to arms! Young, hot, studly arms.
Everywhere I go, everywhere I look, magazines and talk shows are abuzz with Demi Moore's romance with Ashton Kutcher. One headline proclaimed their "May-December" fling.
Listen, she's 40, not 80, for crying out loud. That makes her a late July, early August, tops. Screw this December shit. She's not Maude and he's not Harold.
I think to myself, "Oh, jeez, people, get the hell over it already!"
But that's not going to happen.
You know why?
Because not enough forty year old women are dating 25 year old men, that's why. It's a rare enough occurrence that it sets imaginations ablaze. I would like to exhort all you 40 year old women out there to march, march onto every college campus and into every hot grad student's office! Ambush young studs outside every cheap bar, athletic shoe store entrance, and Dumb and Dumberer premiere!
Only when older-woman-younger-man relationships become de rigeur will my newsstand visits be free of these shocked headlines. Do it for me. Do it for my sanity. When I'm 40, I'll do it for you, too.
Everywhere I go, everywhere I look, magazines and talk shows are abuzz with Demi Moore's romance with Ashton Kutcher. One headline proclaimed their "May-December" fling.
Listen, she's 40, not 80, for crying out loud. That makes her a late July, early August, tops. Screw this December shit. She's not Maude and he's not Harold.
I think to myself, "Oh, jeez, people, get the hell over it already!"
But that's not going to happen.
You know why?
Because not enough forty year old women are dating 25 year old men, that's why. It's a rare enough occurrence that it sets imaginations ablaze. I would like to exhort all you 40 year old women out there to march, march onto every college campus and into every hot grad student's office! Ambush young studs outside every cheap bar, athletic shoe store entrance, and Dumb and Dumberer premiere!
Only when older-woman-younger-man relationships become de rigeur will my newsstand visits be free of these shocked headlines. Do it for me. Do it for my sanity. When I'm 40, I'll do it for you, too.